M: I can’t understand this idea that I fear God. I rarely even think about God, so how is it that I fear God?
Yet, no matter what option you choose, God is not available IN your world, but only IN you.
Nevertheless, although you have wondered, you have NOT achieved certainty. In fact, what you have decided to believe has resulted in the fear that comes with doubt.
How could you not fear what you believe is not only Source of life, but source of death? In fact, because of this belief, obviously, you not only fear death, but life itself. Life and death seem to converge in doubt, since the ultimate question is HOW could what creates, also destroy.
This doubt, based on an absurd belief that God destroys, is why you have yet to LIVE. Although you continue to believe that your body is proof of "life," the mind withers under such proof. The mind that experiences fear cannot realize a Life that accentuates every moment as the only moment.
Imagine an experience of having "all the time in the world," with no end to what you CAN experience, and you will understand eternity. However, you may find this incomprehensible simply because you have defined your mind by the limits of time and thus, each thought you construct is limited by that definition.
M: But the atheist believes that death is simply a part of evolution. We die and are returned to the earth to provide in some way for new life.
Not to believe in God, leaves you as bereft of joy, as your belief in a "god" that decrees death. Either option results in a "life" of suffering. The only certainty you believe you can ever rely on is that one day you will die. Yet, I teach that this is NOT certain and, as the most uncertain of all your possibilities, simply cannot BE true. Your Being contradicts death, but only if you believe that God gave it to you for all eternity. Why would God grant you Being, if not for LIFE? Of course, God defines Life differently than you and it has always been my role to teach you God's definition so that you can be free of the suffering inherent in your's.
M: But I can never have certainty?
M: Ok, so if my soul does not die my body certainly will.
Fear demands the body be idolized based on a belief in “living,” only to become the ashes of death contingent on the "soul" continuing. These levels of the "afterlife" have not eased your suffering and only serve to confuse you. Only what is real should be considered and none of your "parts" have ever been real, except in your mind.
M: But I experience the body as real. Should I discount that experience?
Only through understanding what it IS and therefore, what you ARE, can you consistently contact "experiences" of joy, as opposed to your normalizing suffering through belief in change. I do not teach you to discount what you believe as true, I only ask that you see the truth YOU have given it and, through that, it can trouble you no more.
There is NO denying that your thoughts have been very troubling to you, but I assure you God is completely untroubled, simply because God does NOT think like YOU. Maybe YOU should think like God.
Clarity is the purpose of vision, while sight will always show you images of what you believe is true and continue to trouble you through an absence of peace. Peace is all you have ever wanted and because you want it, you shall have everlasting peace. All you need do is accept yourself as worthy of my offer. God does not allow for Peace to be disturbed and thereby, maintains Heaven, even though your ideas of God are ideas of hell. You cannot alter Truth in any way, so why live as though you HAVE?
M: So what is the body?
M: How do I awake from this dream or change this 'idea' of myself?
You are awake and have always been so. But if you continue to refuse the "idea" of waking, you will NOT "experience" the peace that awakening extends, and you will continue to dream of a reality that is NOT.
M: How can I be dreaming, but awake at the same time?
M: But time is real for me.
M: But, everyone lives based on time.
Yet, you do desire sharing your experience as only one bereft of Love could. You feel so utterly alone, that even words that signify nothing seem like the sharing of the universe to you. But "words" must always limit the experience of sharing. God does not share words because Truth cannot be known to the mind that shares "words" of love, but knows it NOT.
But God does share Truth through the Love that Created you REAL, beyond all doubt and beyond any of your "ideas" of what is “real." When you share the love that does NOT require words, you will know your Being as shared by God.